Kids at the Wedding: The Pros and Cons
Before we dive in on this subject, I think it’s important to note that I adore children. I was a babysitter and later a nanny, for the better part of a decade. I also think it’s important to note that everyone is different, and is going to approach the subject with a list of reasons why my pros and cons list doesn’t apply to them. My goal is not to convert you to one side or another, but merely to bring up facts you possibly hadn’t considered before.
Cool? Cool. So with that being said, I give you my kiddos Pro/Con list:
Pro: They’re adorable.
Guys. I don’t know who remembers the show “Kids Say The Darndest Things”, but I’m convinced that they could totally make an entire television show around kids at weddings and it would be just as popular.
We always tell parents, couples, and the bridal party that they should be prepared for literally anything on the wedding day when kids are involved in the ceremony. Were they perfect at the rehearsal? Let’s not hold our breath for them to be awesome two days in a row. Did they cry all morning? The promise of a new toy after the ceremony if they’re good can work wonders.
But at the end of the day, they’re memorable and adorable, and they add a personal flair to an already special occasion.
Con: They get grouchy.
They’re moody little kids, y'all. This should not come as a surprise! Often they’re being asked to walk down the aisle in the middle of nap time, or took a few too many trips to the candy bar and now they’re crashing from the sugar high.
When we know there will be kids at the wedding, we often recommend having a babysitter on site or another exit strategy for them, so they don’t have the expectation of staying through the end of the evening.
Pro: They leave a lasting impression and funny material.
90% of the time, even when something goes wrong, the kids are what people will continue talking about long after the wedding has ended.
One of our ring bearers goes down in history as taking his little sister’s flower girl petals and vowing to do her job for her because she wasn’t feeling well-- and then proceeded to throw them back over his shoulder the entire way down.
Con: They are a distraction.
We try to be very intentional about when and where the kids will be needed on a wedding day, because we understand that inevitably, they’re going to be a distraction to all that needs to get done in a short period of time.
If mom and dad are also in the bridal party, we will often recommend the kids being brought later by a babysitter or grandparent, so they don’t have to be entertained all day but rather, can show up, be adorable, and then be done with their responsibilities.
Pro: It’s a memory for when they get married one day.